I call this “the melancholy” feeling. when this feeling wraps my head around, it feels as if my whole life is a scene from some kind of sad music video with the blue ambient throughout the video and the stories unravel very very slowly like in 5 cm per second, and i’m a spectator watching all my life unfolds in front of me as if i’m watching youtube or something. the video i watch is like every other tragedy movies, makes you sad and down and wanna crawl into bed and forget that you have ever watched so sad a movie, except that i can’t make my brain forget and just stop and close the video, because it’s life, i can’t stop its flow without ending my life along with it.

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